Little by Little, Day by Day

This post is a response to this story:

Reading this story about Abdu’l-Baha was wonderful, and easy. Trying to listen to others the way that Abdu’l-Baha did, was (and is?) challenging.

With an imagination that runs wild, I sometimes find it hard to focus on the “here and now”, or, as some people refer to it, “reality”. Regardless, I manage to get through the daily run of conversations and communications, without anyone really noticing that I’m sometimes there, sometimes not. When I decided to try and listen to people the way that Abdu’l-Baha did in the story, I was confronted immediately with my own attention deficit. How was I going to be able to listen to people when I couldn’t even focus on a conversation for its duration. I was really scared for the first two days. I felt like such a flake. I realized in the middle of two conversations that I’d actually asked a question, and then thought about something else as the person was giving me a response. I was sick with the realization of the depths of my own inattention. The situation was dire. The darkness was deep. This feeling lasted for a few days.

Then,

All of a sudden, I had to listen. I had to focus on people. I wanted desperately to know every detail of what was being said! Who were these people around me? What was going on?? for the last two weeks, I spent a few moments of every single conversation double-checking the fullness of my focus. I’ve become more diligent with my listening. Still far from listening to people “with their own ears”, but I find I’m far more involved in my conversations, and have to ask for less clarifications. Which is wonderful. However, by far the greatest benefit and improvement which I’ve found after reading this story of Abdu’l-Baha is in my prayers.

In the story, Howard Colby-Ives mentions Baha’u'llah’s words, “When the sincere servant calls to Me in prayer I become the very ear with which He heareth My reply.” About a week after reading this story (and deciding that I was going to listen to people more), this line began to pop into my head after saying my prayers. Often, I say my prayers, and, when I am done, go on to something else in a prompt manner. As if the act of saying the words of a prayer is the whole event. When I heard this line in my mind, I reflected on it (about the third day in a row when it appeared), and realized that I wasn’t listening during the most important conversation of the day. There is a state of ‘openness’ which comes with listening when one is praying and meditating that I now feel I have a small inkling of. The state of openness, in addition to learning to be more generous with my attention in conversations, are things that I consider myself lucky to have had a chance to reflect on, and try to develop.